With the approach of the semester break, there is an excitement among students and a sense of anxiety among parents.
Specialist Clinical Psychologist Ömer Bayar from Üsküdar University NPISTANBUL Hospital states that there are different thoughts under these feelings.
The semester break, which is eagerly awaited after an intense semester, all the lessons, exams, and homework, is the best time for students to have fun as they wish, enjoy bed without the rush of getting up early, and spend time with their friends. For parents, the most anticipated thing during the semester break is the grades on the report card that will come home.
CURIOUS ABOUT THE RESULTS OF PARENTAL SUGGESTIONS
Ömer Bayar, Specialist Clinical Psychologist from Üsküdar University NPISTANBUL Hospital, pointed out that parents who follow their children around with the questions "did you study, did you do your homework?" for a semester and worry about their future are actually curious about the results of both their own suggestions and their children's efforts.
Ömer Bayar stated that when the grades are low, families are in a hurry to complete the sadness, deficiencies and catch up, and if the grades are high, they make an effort to maintain this pace and prevent the grades from dropping, and that the semester break means an interim preparation and transition period for most parents.
MAKE EMPATHY
Suggesting families to put "lessons and homework" in the background as they enter the semester break, Specialist Clinical Psychologist Ömer Bayar invited parents to empathize. Stating that children will increase their motivation at the end of the holiday, which they will start without stress, Bayar said:
"Imagine that you return home exhausted after a very busy week at work. The first thing on your mind would be to put your feet up during the weekend, have a good rest and take care of other things that will relax you outside of work. Imagine arriving home with these expectations, your phone rings and your boss tells you that you have a report due at the beginning of next week and that you should take the weekend to prepare it. How would you feel at that moment? For a child who comes home eager to go on vacation, a parent's attitude of 'Solve this many questions and study this much on this vacation' will make them feel the same way as the above example makes you feel. Let them start this process they have been dreaming of in the way they want. This way, their morale and motivation will increase and they will be more eager to study later on."
HOW SHOULD THE SEMESTER BREAK BE UTILIZED?
Ömer Bayar said that children who are constantly told to "study" during the holiday will experience great disappointment and gave the following advice for the holiday:
"Even if children study with the pressure of their parents, it is not possible to get efficiency from these lessons. In addition, it would not be a realistic expectation for them to complete the lessons they missed during the two-week vacation period at home. Instead, give your children more flexibility than usual during the vacation period. Let them sleep a little later, enjoy lying in bed in the morning, spend time with their friends and play the games they want to play on the computer. At this point, parents may think: He's just playing games, he's not doing anything else, he won't get up if we don't tell him to! At this point, our other advice to you is to offer your children alternatives. Because children generally tend to do what they like the most from the options available to them.
Exploring, playing and having fun is a very important part of their lives, and it is not easy for children to meet these needs at home and in their routines. Offer them different options where they can enjoy themselves, experiment, develop and learn new things. For example, a holiday camp they can attend during the semester with their peers, new hobbies they can be interested in, sports and art activities will allow your child to explore different areas that suit them. In addition, instead of saying 'Don't watch TV, don't play games', a communication style such as 'Would you like to try this, would you consider participating in this?" will be more appealing."
SEE VACATION AS AN OPPORTUNITY FOR YOUR FAMILY!
Stating that it is difficult to do something as a family both in the busy work life and responsibilities of parents and in the uninterrupted education process of children, Specialist Clinical Psychologist Ömer Bayar recommends families to spend this time in quality:
"Although many families spend enough time together, this amount is considerably reduced when it comes to spending quality time. What we mean by quality time is that family members spend time with each other in a common activity and strengthen the relationship and communication between them by sharing their feelings and thoughts during this process. You can organize and carry out activities such as trips, camping, artistic activities that you normally cannot do or postpone during the holidays. In this way, you can have the opportunity to strengthen the relationships and ties within the family."
PLAN TOGETHER WITH TEACHERS!
Specialist Clinical Psychologist Ömer Bayar recommends that parents who are not satisfied with the performance of their students during the education period should meet with their teachers and make a plan rather than making a plan on their own; "Although taking on the role of a teacher on your own may seem to help your child in the short term, it is actually an attitude mistake that will both reduce their performance and distance them from you. Instead, leave the role of educator to the teachers and organize with them how you can plan for the future. You can clarify the path to be followed in the next semester with additional lessons, studies and study programs in the areas deemed appropriate by the teachers and create a concrete goal for your child to follow."
Stating that the more opportunities children are provided to experience the concept of "holiday" in their minds, the higher the morale and motivation will be in the period after the holiday, Specialist Clinical Psychologist Ömer Bayar summarizes what can be done during the semester break as follows:
- Give your child flexibility to rest and have fun.
- Create new areas and options for them to try.
- Strengthen your relationship with activities you can do as a family.
- Organize educational plans with their teachers.