Child psychology in divorce, divorce is a common social event in today's societies.
Child psychology in divorce, divorce in couples with children is not only a process between spouses, but also a situation that can bring many changes with a very high potential to affect children. However, with the right approach and attitudes, it is not necessarily a situation that is inevitable to affect children in a bad way.
How should divorce be explained to children?
Child psychology in divorce, parents should act consciously and together to ensure that children come out of this situation with the least damage.
- Before the divorce, the subject should be explained to them in a simple language and they should get used to the situation.
- Many children feel responsible for their parents' divorce. Therefore, use our words
- In addition, a number of negative emotions such as fear, sadness, regression, decline in school achievement, desire to reconcile with parents, loneliness, rejection, and sleep problems are also common problems in children. However, these reactions do not occur in all children or do not have the same severity. There are two reasons for this; firstly, not every child is affected by every event at the same rate, and secondly, even if the effects of the event are equal, the reactions and the timing of the reaction may be different.
- In simple terms for the child, he/she will no longer have equal access to the two people he/she has been most attached to until that day, namely his/her mother and father, and his/her world will be divided in a sense. After the divorce, the child will live in the same house with only one parent, usually the mother.
- After divorce, there are major changes in many areas such as the frequency of contact between the child and the parent with whom the child lives and the parent who has left the home, the responsibilities of the mother and father regarding the child and the fulfillment of child-related tasks. Therefore, both parents need to adapt to the new situation and restructure their relationships with their children after divorce.
- One of the biggest difficulties of divorced parents is that they have to pay more attention to their children and be consistent while they are going through a difficult period and trying to adapt to a new situation. It is very important that both mother and father participate frequently and regularly in their children's activities in and out of school.
- In addition, when a child moves from one parent's home to the other, he/she needs to find a special place for himself/herself, playmates, etc.
Child psychology in divorces, regardless of the reasons for divorce, parents should keep their personal feelings of anger, hatred and revenge in the background in order not to spoil the other parent's relationship with the child, and it is best to inform the child that there is only a difference of perspective between them, that they cannot get along as before and that the love between them has ended, but that the love of both of them for him/her continues to increase, and to ensure that other family members approach the child in this direction. In the following process, when the child reaches an age where he/she can understand and objectively understand some events and situations and evaluate human relations in all aspects, necessary explanations can be made in an appropriate environment, with an appropriate method and language.
When we look at child psychology in divorces and take all these situations into consideration, it is of course the healthiest for parents to go through this process under the supervision of an expert in order to follow the right path, to develop the right approaches, and to both help and protect the child's emotional and/or behavioral reactions.